066. Brooke Heym
Brooke Heym
Sexual Empowerment and Intimacy Coach
Website: www.brookeheym.com
Instagram: @brookeheym
Brooke Heym is a highly sought-after sexual empowerment coach. She helps people gain power and control over their lives and their sexuality by focusing on relationships, starting with their relationship with themselves. Brooke advises and partners with other coaches, communities, and organizations also focused on improving the state of humanity. She is a frequent guest on podcasts and panels discussing relationships, communication, and sexual empowerment. Brooke spent much of her early career in corporate leadership, building and training teams, including helping hire and rehabilitate people with criminal records. Brooke was sexually abused for much of her childhood and the pattern of abuse continued into her adulthood. In her twenties, Brooke made a choice to take back her power and her life and has spent more than a decade on a journey of growth and learning. She’s developed content and processes to overcome trauma, guilt, and shame to live your best life.
Brooke is another amazing guest. There are a couple things I especially want to focus on for this one.
1. Talk to your children. Make sure that communications are open and happening early on so that they feel comfortable coming to you later for bigger things. One of the ways to protect your children is to teach them the proper, correct words for anatomy. Penis and vagina and breasts are not bad words. They are the correct words to use. When your kids know the proper names, they can tell you if they are hurt or something is feeling off, and they can also tell you if those parts have been violated by someone. Proper naming of parts is essential. AND. Listen to your children. I don’t just mean listen to what they tell you with their mouths—with their words. Listen to what they tell you with their body language, moods, emotions, and behaviors. Young children are not good at holding stuff in because they have not yet been taught and conditioned to do that. They are telling you, you just need to listen.
2. You are worthy. You are worthy of joy, happiness, love, and safety. If you are not safe, you need to get into a space and a position where you are safe. And I mean safe physically, emotionally, and mentally. You are absolutely allowed to stand up for yourself and not make everyone happy. You are allowed, and encouraged, to set boundaries so that you are okay. Some people may not like that. You will upset some people. That’s okay. I know it’s hard, especially if you’re a people person or hate conflict. Setting boundaries and taking care of yourself will often upset someone. Do it anyway. Because you are worth it and you are worthy of joy and happiness and safety. One more time for the people in the back. YOU ARE WORTHY OF JOY, HAPPINESS, AND SAFETY. Yes you.
I want to make sure to include some great resources that Brooke suggests for talking to your kids.
How To Talk to Your Kids About Sex: an age-by-age guide
Tips for Child Sex-Abuse Prevention
And a book recommendation below!
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